In which I get morbid….

October 1, 2011 Ka'ela Ja'el

Today I went to a funeral.

It was sad, as these occasions are wont to be, but for me I found the sadness reached a new level. Uncle J was the first of The Next Generation of my maternal family to pass away.

Earlier this year, Aunty P died. She was my dad’s only sister, and she was 89, so she had a good innings.

Uncle J on the other hand, was the husband of my mum’s oldest sister. He was not quite 70. (Yeah, work the maths out, there’s a big age gap somewhere that maybe I’ll tell you about one day.)

He’s been battling cancer for the last six months, in a not very pleasant kind of way. So in the end, it was a blessing really.

Anyway, it occurred to me in the last few days that this is the beginning of the end of my mum’s generation. Yeah, I know, rather morbid, really, but the reality is that all mum’s siblings and partners are of an age that really they are going to start passing away.

In fact, the maternal side of my family has done rather well really, when I think about it. My mother has five siblings, and each of them is married. So I still have two parents and nine aunts and uncles. Pretty good really, in the scheme of things. My grandparents were both close to their 90’s when they passed away, but other than that the only death in the subsequent generations has been my brother, Brusome.

And while one side of me is saying “Come on! They are entitled to grow old!” and “Really!? One person out of twelve family members! Be thankful!” the other is doing the math (1) and saying “Time is running out!”  But despite this, I’m being all morbid, and looking at the prospects of my various family members:  My aunt has recently been diagnosed with ovarian cancer – some incredibly rare form that even her specialist has only ever read about, so they are totally unsure of how it will respond to treatment. My uncle has some lung disease that requires some heavy duty treatment every couple of months. Closer to home, my dad is 86 now and his health issues over the past few years have really started to slow him down and turn him into an old man, and this isn’t to mention the health issues mum has accumulated since her car accident.

So, yeah. Possibly over tired from a big weekend, and emotionally drained = morbid.


(1) Have I told you one of my motto’s is ‘Maths is evil’, and I’m not very good at maths!?


Entry Filed under: Family,Family History

One Comment Add your own

  • 1. stephbg  |  October 1, 2011 at 11:40 pm

    Your thoughts seem perfectly reasonable to me. I have never had much family so when we lost Grandma a few years ago–the only relative of her generation–I felt as though some kind of safety ceiling had been removed from my parents. They were next! I think that’s what contributed to the shock of losing my brother. I’d reluctantly tried to prepare myself for the utter impossibility of losing my parents, so it was incomprehensible that one of my siblings could die so soon. I also see the steady sad loss of my friends’ parents. It was my MIL nearly a year ago, and very likely soon it will be FIL. Sometimes it can seem that death is all around, but that’s not far from the truth so it’s not morbid to become more aware of it now and then, especially at a funeral. Take care.

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